Sadville

My life is good.  Really, really good.

And I am happy.  Really, really happy.

But some days I still feel a little off balance.  A little left of center.  A little over sensitive and tender.

Life is ouchy.

Source

There’s no apparent reason for these feelings.  Nothing bad happened. No one did anything to me.

I think that’s what makes this kind of malaise feel not real.  Part of me would like to dismiss it.  I hear myself saying engaging in negative self-talk,

What is my problem?”

and

Whatever it is, you need to get over it, Ryan.”

But I remind myself that there doesn’t have to be a reason for my sadness in order for it to be real. And that the only way to feel something different is to first feel this. 

I remember that the way I honor myself is by bearing witness to the truth of what’s going on with me, whether it’s logical or not. Whether it’s convenient or not. Whether I want to or not.

So for today, I’m doing okay.  Just so-so.  I’m a little sad and a little tired.  I don’t need to be fixed but I do appreciate the kindness of others.  This won’t last forever.  It’s just one day.

And when I’m out of this little detour through Sadville?  I plan on being just a little softer, a little nicer, to those around me.  Because no doubt one of them is taking their turn feeling like this and my smile or kind word might make their detour just a little bit shorter.

 

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Quick!  Say something nice below!

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